Thursday, January 31, 2008

Long Time No Write

Wow. It's been over a year sense I posted anything. Wow.

At first, I didn't post anything because we were just too busy getting things ready and transitioning. Davan ended up going to California with my parents while Anthony and I went to Eugene to meet Judea. We did get to meet him the next Wednesday! We were very excited about that.

We had about a week and a half of transition and then Judea moved in on the 17th of December, right after Davan's birthday. It was a heck of a month.

Then, the reason I never got back to blogging is that I was just too unhappy. Things were so, so, so not easy. It was all just too disappointing to even write about.

Now, though, things are getting better. I've been feeling like blogging again. Partially, I've been inspired by miserablebliss, a blog written by a recent adopter. I've really enjoyed reading Violet and Coffee's adoption process, right through to now, with the actual placement of kids, which is the part I never got around to here.

A quick overview of the year: Judea moved in. Christmas was a bit of a nightmare. We enrolled Judea in kindergarten. Judea got deeper and deeper into negative behavior, culminating in his use of me as a punching bag. We started therapy with a therapist who specializes in working with foster/adoptive kids. We pulled Judea out of school to homeschool and work on bonding with the full support of his therapist. Davan became unhappy and saw the therapist a few times herself. Judea slowly got better, but I was still miserable about things. We actually considered disrupting. I got therapy for me personally, in addition to seeing Judea's therapist. We put Judea back in school for first grade, which he was very happy about. I finally went on Prozac and am getting into a good exercise routine. I hope to come off of the Prozac in a couple of months. Judea, Anthony and I decided on a new name for Judea, which is working out well. It's Max and it really fits him.

Judea, it turns out, does have attachment issues and, probably, some mild fetal alcohol effects, as well as a history of violence. We did not know any of this when we started out. Much of his behavior issues were glossed over or not mentioned at all.

We've also gone to Disneyland as a family twice this year, plus Davan and I went one additional time. We are all Disneyed out, I tell ya!

Davan discovered that a passion of hers is gymnastics and is close to being on the competitive team already! It usually takes about 2 years! Davan has also discovered swimming (for more than just play) and occasionally mutters about swim team.

Anthony has been riding like a madman, even in the winter this year. Work is going well for him and he's been an amazing support for me.

Max has played basketball , soccer and flag football (in a week long summer day camp), as well as trying out gymnastics and swimming. He loves his sports.

I've adapted a lot and learned a lot. I've rejoined a master's swim team (I'd been on a team briefly about 6 years ago).

We're on our way to being a fairly functional family, although it's so much different than I'd hoped it would be, it is what it is and I'm okay with it.

I plan on writing regularly again. I'm thinking of going more into depth about the past year, as well as writing about current happenings.