The Latest Conversation with Barbara

I called Barbara yesterday to check in and see if there were any new bulletins. There were new ones, so I went today to look at them. Barbara asked if we were interested in doing respite care for 5 foster kids one day next month. I'm on the fence. 5 unknown kids all day seems like a lot and it's on a Thursday, which is game day. However, doing respite care will look good for us (demonstrating an ability to work with "special needs") and I'd genuinely like to do it. So, I'm still pondering.

There is still no committee date for Thorn. Sigh.

I picked one sibling group and four individual children for Anthony and I to ponder putting in for. One is a 12 year old named Haley who seems like a very good match. She likes being active and hopes for a younger sibling.

I really, really want Thorn's committee date, though! I don't want to keep putting my heart out there to be trampled on.

Waiting, Waiting, Waiting

It often seems that all we do is wait. Barbara was out of the office for training on Tuesday and Wednesday this week, meaning that I'm sure our homestudy write up is still not done. I'm guessing it won't be this week, either. I think the two hardest parts of the wait are in between knowing that you're going to committee and getting the date and then the week or so before committee. They are both hard because of the not knowing. First not knowing even when you'll find out and then not knowing if you'll be selected.

My best friend is in town visiting for 5 days, so that is a definite distraction. Yay! She just got in yesterday morning and we're having a great time, as always. Today should be even better than yesterday, as she's not bone tired anymore. Yesterday she was running on fumes, having gotten up at 4:30 east coast time and then spending a whole day here. However, she has to work some while here, so I'm catching up on email and such while she works.

Anthony surprised me with taking today and Friday off, so Chris and I are off for the day (we're on line at the library now) for lunch and a bit of used record/book shopping.

Feeling Discouraged Again

Barbara and I only communicated through messages last week. And the upshot of those messages were that it was a busy week for her and she has no new news for me. That tells me that she didn't get our refreshed homestudy write up done.

To further bum me out, Thorn is back up on the page of waiting children in Oregon. What the heck does that mean?

So, I'm feeling bummed and disappointed. No committee date and Barbara seems to be dragging her feet. Maybe things will turn around this week, but I'm not feeling that hopeful.

Monday is Here Again

I don't have much new to share in adoption news. Thorn is no longer listed on the Oregon Waiting Children's web site, although the link from the blog still works. He's on his way to committee. Yay! We still don't have a date. Barbara was out of the office on Friday and Monday is her usual day off, so tomorrow is the earliest we'd hear anything. I suspect with her being out of the office so much, she hasn't gotten our homestudy update written yet. I'm anxious for a date, so I hope that happens soon.

We had a nice weekend at home punctuated by events such as dinner with my parents, a birthday party and working on painting the loft bed in Sam's room. We keep slipping and saying Thorn's room. That's dangerous when it's not 100% yet!

Kids on the Web

Just after I posted that message, I clicked over the the Oregon Waiting Children page and discovered that Tanner has popped up there. I hope no one gets their heart set on him.

Various Updates

I spoke with Barbara both yesterday and today. Yesterday was mostly just sharing what I discussed with Thorn's foster mom. Today I called to see if there were any new bulletins. As hopeful as I am about Thorn, I need to keep going with other possibilities just in case. Otherwise, I think I'd feel even worse if it didn't work out.

There was one boy who was, sort of, added to the list today. A 7 year old named Austin. Funny story about Austin. Back when we first started looking at kids, we put in for a little boy, but committee families had already been selected for him. His case worker, though, after looking at our homestudy, said that she thought we'd be good matches for a boy named Austin about whom she was going to release a bulletin. So, she sent the pre-bulletin (no picture) to Barbara for us to look at. We were quite interested. He seemed like a good match. Over the course of months and months, Barbara tried to get more information, but to almost no avail. She did have one phone conversation with his case worker, which was relayed to us, but that was it. We finally gave up. Then, today, all of a sudden, there he is with a real live bulletin (which is a little different from the first one we were sent). So, we're putting in for him again (sort of).

Barbara also told me that Tanner, the boy who's foster mom we spoke with a couple of weeks ago, is not moving toward committee at this time, after all. There was just a trial for him/his mom and it turns out that Mom is making progress in her treatment. It had been previously expected that she would relinquish rights voluntarily, but now it looks like he'll probably be returned to her at some point. I hope that works out for him. If bio parents can get their act together, I do think it's best for the child. It's a big if, though.

I'm not feeling too disheartened about that, though, because I'm still feeling really hopeful about Thorn. I asked Barbara today when we might expect to have committee for Thorn. She said that his committee will be held here in the Portland area, which means it might be scheduled quickly. She said that the scheduler is waiting for two paperwork items, which are our updated homestudy (get on it, Barbara!) and Thorn's updated adoption child summary (which is done, so I don't know why the scheduler doesn't have it). Barbara speculated that his committee might be as soon as a few weeks.

Another Foster Mom Phone Call

We got the green light to call Thorn's foster mom on Friday. We left that afternoon to camp up at Mt St Helen's for the weekend with my parents and, so, weren't able to call her until this afternoon when we got back.

We had a long, very informative and postive conversation. I've been left reeling from it this afternoon, in fact. It was one comment in particular that has me in a spin. She said that Thorn's case worker told her, "The Gresham family is ready to go so now we can set committee." The Gresham family is us, folks. Thorn's case worker has been waiting for us to set committee, even though it seems that there were enough families before. Apparently, the other families are out of state. Thorn is local to us and I know they'd like to keep him near his current foster family (with whom he is very attached).

What's really annoying about this is that we said we wanted to proceed with Thorn months ago, but Barbara wanted us to wait for his most current evaluation at CDRC.

What's great about it, though, is that Thorn's case worker is so excited about us as a match that she didn't schedule committee until we were ready (or, more accurately, Barbara was ready).

I'm trying hard not to get set on the idea, as it's so crushing to be dissapointed at committee, but I'm a hopeful person today! It seems like this might really be the one.

Interesting 24 Hours or So

Yesterday morning, as Davan and I are leaving to go for a walk around our nearby park, Davan decided to go back in to get a scarf for warmth. While I was waiting, I decided to finally harvest the 5 delicious looking apples in our dwarf apple tree. There were a total of 10 apples - 5 nice looking ones and 5 not so nice looking ones. The 5 nice looking ones were on a limb which hangs down very close to our fence. Well, guess what? Some passerby decided to help themselves to our 5 nice apples! They had still been there just the day before. I was quite annoyed, as I'd shopped for fruit this week with a plan of using those apples. Grr.

After our walk, I came home to a message from Barbara saying that there was a 2 year old boy with committee scheduled for Thursday who had a family back out. She asked if I'd be interested in coming in and taking a look. I was really excited about this, but the fact that he's 2 did give me pause. Davan and I went in to look at his bulletin. He's a very cute little boy with what sounds like a great personality. Unfortunately, though, he has global delays probably due to his mother's phycotropic drugs. We got all the information we could on this little cutie and I ended up feeling conflicted about him. Anthony really felt like we should say no, though, so that was that. I called Barbara this morning to let her know. She was thinking it wasn't a good placement herself (but she almost always does), so the news was taken well. In fact, I think she wasn't looking forward to the work that a yes would mean - preparing for committee tomorrow.

We also found out yesterday that Judea, who is a little boy we were scheduled to go to committee for back in March or so, is having committee set again now. We were all scheduled to go, but then committee was canceled so that a biological placement could be explored. Well, that didn't pan out (although they spent long enough deciding that!) and now his case worker wants to know if we're still interested. We are! So, we should be getting updated information on him soon.

Barbara and I also had a long discussion about Tanner, whom she still seems to be against. She's come up with more questions for his case worker. She's been right in the past, but I don't think she is this time. I'm hoping to move forward with him.

Meanwhile, Davan and I have been to the Children's Museum twice in the last two days, as we have the pass out from the library and she hasn't gotten one stretch that's long enough for her. In theory, we could go tomorrow morning, too, but I'm feeling like I don't really want to do the drive again.

Also, Barbara told me that this month is the month to do an updated homestudy for us. I'm less than thrilled about this, as I'd hoped to have a placement before updating needed to be done. Sigh. We're working on scheduling a time for that.

Start Up the Roller Coaster

We're getting back on ye 'ol horse, to mix my metaphors. Yesterday, Anthony and I called Tanner's foster mom and had a good talk. Tanner is a 6 year old boy whom I believe I've mentioned before. We started getting information on him around the same time as Chance. However, the information on Tanner sort of petered out. Last week, I reminded Barbara that we still wanted to speak with Tanner's foster mom and, on Friday, she gave us her number.

It was a good, informative talk and I we are interested in progressing with Tanner at this point. So, here we go again.

Meanwhile, we also got a new set of information on Thorn from a recent new evaluation that was done on him. Sadly, although it was overall good news for Thorn and his progress, there was one thing that gave me pause. He only sleeps 6 hours a night! I need a lot more sleep than that! So, I have to say I'm feeling iffy this evening about if he's a good match. It was suggested (by one of his evaluators) that he have sleep therapy, so, perhaps with that he'll learn to sleep longer. Maybe it's too harsh to say no based on that. However, it certainly gives me pause.

And, life goes on in other arenas. My parents are in town this weekend. Technically, they live here, but they travel a lot. My mom particularly travels a lot, as she travels for work. We got together with them yesterday to see their new Sprinter RV, share a meal and see pictures of the trip my step dad took in the van, getting it home.