The Verdict

Barbara finally called at 2:30. The committee lasted longer than she anticipated and then she had to get back to her office before calling. The hour and a half longer to bear was hard to handle!

We were not chosen for Alexis. Barbara tells us that we came off very well at committee and they had a difficult time deciding between the family that was chosen and us. She gave us a long list of strengths and only two wonderings. She said usually they'd say negative, but that they weren't really negative, just possible concerns. One was that Davan and Alexis are close in age - Alexis is just over a year younger than Davan. The other was that having two very physically active kids at home might be a challenge for me. That one seems quite silly to us, as we want a physically active child! We don't want someone who just wants to sit around and prevents us from being out and about. Ah well, though. They had to decide somehow.

I asked Barbara about children in the other family and, while she said she couldn't tell us if there were kids or not, let us know that one of the committee's reasons for going with the other family was that they felt that Alexis might need more one on one attention from adults, so it sounds like there are either no other kids or maybe teenagers.

We are disappointed, but not devastated. Anthony says he's actually a little relieved, as Alexis was very bonded with her biological mother and he felt that might be challenging. I have mixed feelings, but really am trying to believe that the right child is out there.

We were chosen as a "back up family". This means almost nothing, but, should the other family back out at the last minute, Alexis can come right to us without recruiting again and holding another committee meeting. We'd even be offered a direct placement if, for some reason, she moved in and the adoption was disrupted. Usually, it's right in the beginning if it's going to happen, though. The chances of this are quite slim.

So, there it is. We've decided that every committee meeting we go to is a cause for dinner out that night for either consolation or celebration. Mostly just because we know it's a stressful day! We're trying to decide where to go this evening.