Davan has taken the disruption in stride. She's had some times where she's cried and some times where she's been just very matter of fact about it. We've been working on keeping the lines of communication about it all open. I've reassured her many times that she will never leave the family. I've explained that Max has a sort of sickness that doesn't let him attach properly to people and that is a big part of why he couldn't live here with us. I've explained that she could never get that sickness. She has soaked up the reassurances and been open with her feelings.
Yesterday evening, though, she was teary. She couldn't say why. She said she just felt very anxious. I gave some suggestions about what might be causing it. She's not worried about having to leave the family. She doesn't miss Max. She, is though, worried about Anthony's and my stress. I don't feel awfully stressed, though. I feel a lot less stressed than I did when Max was still here.
She said that she feels like, because Anthony is sad about Max leaving, that he loves her less.
I feel like, if that's her concern, she probably is worried about us loving her and, at least subconsciously, is worried about being kicked out, as well.
She was teary again this morning and a little overwhelming with deep eye gazing in a rather needy way. I know I need to be patient and reassuring with her. And I am. But, I'll be glad when she and Anthony have worked through these strong initial feelings, although I know we'll all be dealing with backlash for a long time to come.
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